It’s what you say… and it’s subtle

I’m going to share something with you today that has nothing to do with a Friday Find. You’ll thank me for saying this, trust me. One of my mentors shared this with me and I’ve never forgotten this invaluable lesson. Here it is: When sending an email communication, don’t give people a direct order. Yes, you may be asking your direct report, colleague or contractor to do something for you – maybe in a timely manner.  Guess what? Asking someone to do something in this manner doesn’t come across positively. It’s a turn off. Great leaders, like my mentor, understand that you can be direct, and ask people to do something, without coming across negatively. It’s a very subtle thing but highly impactful. Here’s an example of what I mean: Please send me that file before lunch today vs. It would be great if you could send me that file before lunch today Can you feel the difference? Amazing leaders ask for things this way. There’s no need to be a bossy boots in order to get your message across to others. The second sentence is authoritative, assertive and direct but doesn’t have the same negative vibe that the first sentence does. Get it? (from: writingourselveswhole.org) Two things to remember: It’s not just what you say but how you say it.  This is especially when it comes to written communication where tone is hard to interpret. People always want to do a good job. Ask them nicely – and directly – for what you need or want from them. You’ll build a much stronger coalition if you’re not perceived as a bossy person. Put this into practice right away. You’ll be better off for it. Happy Friday!

Elastic hemlines- Just don’t do it

I see it each and every day. Just don’t do it ladies. Don’t wear those blouses with elastic hemlines. Especially if you’re trying to hide something. These are the worst. Unless you are stick thin, with zero chest and zero tummy, this garment will never look good on you. Do you know why? The elastic hem, which typically ends at your hips, is usually much smaller than the billowy material above it.  Since the material above gathers into the elastic hemline, it creates extra – unnecessary – bulk.  Simply put, this blouse will give you an unflattering muffin top, even if you don’t have one. If you have the slightest bit of tummy which (let’s be honest) most of us do, this is just going to draw more attention to this area. I bet you thought this style of blouse would be great to hide or camaflouge an area you’re less comfy with. It doesn’t. What should you do: Rid yourself of this garment.  Sleeves, no sleeves, 3/4 length sleeves – it doesn’t matter.  This garment is not flattering.  Don’t throw it out though, give it to a charitable organization of your choice. Say goodbye to the elastic hemline. Yes, take this to a tailor (or do it yourself) and get the elastic hem removed.  This will totally change the look and feel of this garment.  Now, all that billowy material above the hem will likely leave this blouse with little to no shape.  Ask your tailor to put a couple of darts in to give it a bit of shape around your waist. Look for blouses with flattering cuts.  You can do better than that type of blouse above.  Yes, you may be less comfy with your tummy but totally hiding it is actually drawing attention to it.  Instead, focus on drawing attention to the smallest part of your waist – this is anywhere between your bust and belly button.  Here are some blouse ideas for you. Ricki’s- Mixed Media Peblum Top Shopbop- Torn by Ronny Kobo Modcloth- Eva Franco on the Glam-paign Trail Top in Waves Aritzia- Babaton Emmett Blouse Now get into that closet and purge! You’re welcome.

Back to Work: Formal business attire that’s anything but stuffy (Part 3)

You have a busy work and social life.  I get that. This outfit, from our last style segmenton Breakfast Television, is going to show you how to straddle the work-to-networking-event line. Yes, there is such a line. Let’s get to it. 3rd Look: Going to a Networking Event                                           Why this is awesome: You’re a busy person. This outfit does double duty from the office to that business cocktail or networking event you need to get to. Don’t overthink it- just put this on and get to work. This outfit has a powersuit look and feel yet it translates flawlessly to an evening business event. It’s a lot more interesting that your simple black dress (though I do love a classic LBD). Throughout this past segment, we’ve been talking about black blazers – you know, that one that you think goes with everything. Instead of that simple black blazer, try one that has some embellishment. This one is has beading along the slanted side pockets. Love. This skirt is killa! Yes, wear this to work. You’ll stand out… for all the right reasons. Now, get to it! Back to work this month means stepping it up ladies. Who contributed to this look? Hair: Colleen McGinn Makeup: Gina Bilocerkowec Clothing, Shoes and Accessories: Good Stuff Styling: Me, of course.